This post of mine is dedicated to all those women in the world who think that restrooms are an appropriate place to have long conversations!! Why only women?! Well, because I don’t really know if they have such characters in the gentlemen’s toilets too. In case there are such people in the XY category, then I would like to extend this dedication to them also :)
Of the various toilet talkers there is this one category of people, who only have one-to-one conversations but only via the mirror. These women always enter the restrooms in groups and all of them have some touching up to do. They will tall take up equi-distant spots in front of the mirror and talk to each other via the mirror. During their entire stay not once will they look directly at each other, no sir! They will discuss their make up, their hair cuts, their new perfume brands, the perfume brands of people they don’t like, the latest sale premiere, the hottest guy, and many other such relevant things – but all via the silver reflector. These women hardly ever notice other people in the rest room and even if they do, they make sure that they make that person know that she is not worth their notice :)
Then there is this other category, they always enter the restroom in pairs. One of the persons is the story teller and the other is a listener or should I say one of them has a sob story and the other is an agony aunt. My gawd!!! One keeps on whining and the other keeps on consoling or encouraging or just keeps on repeating - “sab theek ho jaayega!”. The lady in trouble is perennially in trouble sometimes it is the boyfriend, sometimes it’s the boss, some you always find complaining about their in-laws and others keep cribbing about insensitive landlords. But where to talk about such reverend subjects? Let’s go to the toilet!
I still have some respect for the kind of people mentioned above, but these other ones are even worse. They are the cellphone talkers. The person on the other-side of the phone isn’t even aware that he/she is being dragged inside a noisy ladies room or maybe they are aware and unwilling, yet they can’t do much about it. When I see a girl sitting on the slab of the restroom, smiling and tugging at her hair and talking flirtatiously with somebody on the other side, I wonder why she wants to spoil a beautiful moment like this in such stink? Why she wants the sweet nothings she’s hearing on the phone to gel with the sound of someone flushing the toilet? Don’t the random plopping sounds embarrass her as she talks to someone special?
Then finally there is this wonderful variety of people who like to talk on the phone when they are themselves in action. I have no words to describe what I feel towards such people and the level of amazement I feel at their ability to talk in same tone while their body is busy extricating. I can’t help wondering what the person on the other side thinks.
I am glad I don’t find answers to all of my questions.